- BE AN ACTIVE LISTENER
Listening is one of the most important skills you need to develop as a mother. How well you listen to your daughter has a major impact on the quality of your relationship with her. In listening, you achieve the following;
- You listen to understand her.
- You listen to enjoy her company.
- You listen to learn.
- You listen to influence, persuade and negotiate.
- You listen to avoid conflict and misunderstanding. Active listening is all about building a rapport, understanding and trust.
Here are ideas that will sharpen your listening skills;
- Restating: to show you are listening, paraphrase what your daughter has said.
- Minimal encouragers: use positive prompts to keep the conversation going like, “ummm-hmmm” oh” ” I understand,” “Then?” “And?”
- Reflecting: reflect your daughter’s words into feelings for example, “this seems so important to you.”
- Probing: ask her questions to draw out and get deeper and meaningful information.
- Validation: appreciate her willingness to talk about the issue
- Effective pause: deliberately pause at key points for emphasis, it tells her that you are saying something very important to her.
- Redirecting: if she is showing signs of being aggressive, then it’s time to shift the discussion to another topic.